So i was at home browsing my internet when a popup for a p*rn website comes up. As an intriguedLAD i clicked upon it, it offered me a 2 day trial for 1 US dollar (62p) i thought i can't go wrong here this website looks solid, put my credentials in. Tried to watch a video, it said an error has occured, so i tried to watch another, and it said you have used your free trial. I was a fumingLAD but turned the page off and thought nothing of it. Week later at work im checking my back account, i can see my wage has just gone in, but i only have 150 quid in. So i thought theyd underpaid me. Turns out i was wrong. A payment of 39.95 had came out of my account. And at this point i 100% had no idea totally confusedLAD . I was panicing loads, and it'd took me overdrawn the previous day so the bank threw on a 25 pound charge, i was sh*tting it that bad i rang the fraud department for that bank telling them i had no idea where it came from, this was the most awkward phone call of my life. Im telling her "oh yeah a transactions come out of my account and i dont know what for, i actually work downstairs so im ringing you from there, BankerLAD, can you tell me what it is?" she replied very slowly, and quietly.. "looks like its from an explicit video website" and it this point im so embarrased thinking someone i work with knows i pay for p*rn.. All i could reply was, musta been my brother using my card again then hung up.. went back into my office and just sat down quietly, everone at work was asking me if i knew what it was yet.. Just told them i didnt know, rushed home and emailed the website angrily and told them my embarrasing escapade. (in the meantime downloaded as many movies as i could makemostofthesituationLAD) they emailed back laughing at my siuation but told me they would refund me. So happy days! Moral of the story is stick to being a freep*rnLAD not a Paysforp*rnLAD
Earlier I went round to 8/10 Wenches place and to my amazement she walked through the bedroom door in just her knickers and heels so I did the deed with the fingers and sucked her nips, As soon as she heard me undo my belt she was changed and in bed complaining of toothache and wanting cuddles, FumingLAD
So me decide to throw a party simply for the hell of it. So obviuosly I invite the LAD pack to come. Including one guy who's in for it with this wench. SO me being friends with said wench. I invite her along to try and get the LAD some action. So the nights going well, music blaring, LADS getting properally wasted when we look over and see the LAD getting of with the wench. after he's done we congratulate him for his LADDISH nature and then to take the piss as the wenches first words after were 'I think he bit my tongue'
So me and the LADS were just out chilling round the street roughly 2 am in the morning, as we are deciding to go home i gets a text off some wench (6.5/10) saying ''come meet me im locked out'' obviously i took this as an advantage to ''save the day'' and went and met her about 10 minutes away at b&q carpark. So it starts with a bit of kissing but not a lot of action. Now alhtough i have sh*t eyesight, i had LADsight and saw that there were some b&q display sheds outside the store so i dropped the line 'im freezing lets go in one of them sheds' ;) pitch black, splinters flying everywhere but i got this girl wet done my job and officially christened that shed ;) mentioning this was right ouside the shed there was definitely cameras around...b&qLAD
Natalie Pinkham, Sky Sports F1 reporter goes Ice racing with 2007 F1 champion Kimi Raikkonen, he drives her around for abit, then they swap and she drives, after a couple of minutes she crashes and she says "I love it how you let me crash" and Kimi replies "Happens often with women in cars" IcemanLAD
This week I ventured out for beers. A few beers in and the group heads to a table inside where it's a little warmer. Seconds later an eccentric Talkative Wench from the table across descends to talk. And talk she does - far too much. Being a friendless lad in a new city I entertain this. And a little bit more. And she keeps talking. Not one to give any lass the cold shoulder I don't stop her - despite the Oxbridge talk (yawn). Suddenly Talkative Wench's nominated safety wench bombs in: "You know she's only 18 right?", "Yeah, I can tell". Before I can say I'm not remotely interested in her friend she jumps in again, "How old are you", "Old enough" I reply, "How hold is that?", "Twenty-seven" - at which point Talkative Wench stares at her safety wench and says, "Oh no - not again! Why does this always happen to meeeee?", and immediately has a weird 'safety cuddle' with her wench acting as if they narrowly escaped a dangerous predator... by the skin of their teeth. Lads, this is the first time I ever felt old :( Kids - get out of the fcuking pub!
I liked this girl (7.5/10) for a long time and we were really close until she friend zoned me and told me she had feelings for my bestLAD. Naturally, as any friend would, I swallowed my pain and wished my mate all the best. However my mate knew that I liked her for ages so didn't try anything with her. This tale of two LADs showing their mutual respect and loyalty may seem nice, but said girl is now getting with a random pikey on the regular and has had a boob job. MoralsOverWenches
So me and bestLAD are out on the lash one night when he starts chatting with this 7/10 before we leave for another club. Within the hour he is talking to another WENCH who is 6/10 sober and he ends up taking her home but as we leave he runs in to the 7/10. This is where we go our seperate ways. Later that week I ask what he ended up doing. His response was "what else could I do? I had to fcuk them both" WhatelsecouldIdoLAD
So, me and my housemate have a house on a corner of a road where the olympic torch was going and just before the torch got to us we set up some tables in our front garden and started dancing like mad men on the tables in full view of everyone. We then got down and stood and watched but these two wenches came up and said they liked our dancing (they were 8 and maybe a 6).
Best night in months.
So during my first year of uni, me and wingmanLAD were out on halloween dressed as a Tiger and a Lion hunting for clunge. About halfway through the night after vast quantities of alcohol had been consumed I had the beer goggles on and noticed that wingmanLAD (called that because of the amount of pussy he gets) had been cornered by a horrible 3/10 fat wench dressed as a pirate and he was looking around for one of the LADs to save him. I decided to be a kindLAD and save him but managed to get trapped myself while he got away. In order to end a 2 year dry spell I went for it. At the end of the night the suggestion was made to go back to hers. Now the rest of the night except for smashing her is a mystery to me as I somehow managed to wake up with a ridiculous amount of small injuries and no clue where I was. I then proceeded to walk home while getting funny looks because i was still dressed as a tiger! TigerLAD
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