This a game for all the lonely lads out there.
 
Rule No.1: Type in redtube.com/
Rule No.2: After the "/" type in 5 random numbers then click enter
Rule No.3: Thou must watch all the way through.

My mate talking about his ex moving on last night after he had a few drinks "It's like i know i was never interested in her at all, but it's just like when you have leftover food in the fridge, you don't want to eat it but you may do at some point, and when someone does eat it you're like hey...that's my fcuking food." interestingpointLAD

So after pulling this lovely girl the other night, I ended up back at her house, in her bedroom, getting frisky. She seemed completely different to the girl that I had met in the club as she was really going in hard with the whole foreplay. Just as the passion was building up, I started to hear scratches at the door, and eventually some sort of crying... Turns out it was her dog, so she let the dog in who then went and chilled in the corner of the room whilst the two of us got back down to the real business. After a few minutes she got up and asked if i could pick her up against the wall...of course I obliged. It was getting quite steamy and I could feel myself about to come... And then it happened. The dog left his corner, ran over to me, and started to wrap himself around my leg! I was caught in two minds; do I pretend the dog isn't there and finish? Or do I stop everything that is going on, mid org*sm and brush the dog off me? I opted to power through with the dog still going at it. Can't say it was the proudest moment of my life.

After a heavy night on the town with the flatmates, and crawling a number of clubs, the night was drawing to a close. I felt I needed to clear up the floor, and so ended up with a bird who would have been hitting a 6 or 7 out of 10. The two of us headed back to hers to continue the night, and ended up playing ring of fire with her housemates. One of them was an absolutely steaming blonde who must have been pushing an 8 or 9. As the drinks continued to flow the girl I had initially gone home with was absolutely plastered and said she was heading to bed. I told her I would shortly follow, but instead, continued playing ring of fire with the cute blonde. One thing lead to another and the next thing I know I was with her on the kitchen table. After the deed was done I was left with the choice of walking back to mine, a good 40 minute walk, or just crashing on their sofa.
I was awoken at 9am by the original bird who I had bought home stroking my forehead and thanking me for not taking advantage of her when she was so drunk. She bought me in a Full English breakfast, and preceded to thank my gentlemanly-ness by finishing off my morning glory.