Personally, I've never sent an unsolicited dick pic because I'm aware of the fact pretty much no one has ever wanted to load up their Snapchat to find a unrecognised member flashing them in the face. In fact, I'd go as far as to say it's one of the easiest ways to completely blow any chance you might have had with a potential partner.
Still, apparently lots of men still think it's a good idea. And rather than just straight blocking them, one woman has decided to start sending men who flash her their dick a hilarious 'rejection letter'.
The full letter reads:
"Dear Sir,
"Thank you for the unexpected and unsolicited submission of your penis portrait for our consideration. We regret to inform you that it has failed to pass our most basic standards of quality control at this time.
"However, for a nominal fee we can offer you a report that will help you change that.
"The A4 report, provided via postal service, will include a personalised booklet that covers the following:
"Why genitals are not an acceptable conversation opener (a step by step guide to saying hello).
"How to appear as though you weren't raised by wolves.
"Better ways to deal with your sexual frustration.
"How to dress your penis for social media (a rough guide to pants).
"AND
"Penis reading: a new form of palmistry that may help you unlock the key to your future.
"We will also answer questions you might have such as:
"Do I have too much time on my hands?
"And
"Why did my penis fail basic standards of quality control?
"(Note: the number one reason for this occurring is that it is attached to a bigger dick than itself.)
"Finally, as a gesture of goodwill we intend to offer two free samples with all of your future penis portrait submissions:
"An inventive critique of your pride & joy.
"AND
"A surprise consultation with your closest available family member about your portfolio.
"We trust this exciting offer is acceptable and look forward to working with you in the near future.
"Yours faithfully."
Good banter, Sarah-Louise Jordan.
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