In what we can only presume was an attempt to have a press conference which was discussed more than pal Donald Trump a few days ago, Vladimir Putin thought he would defend the president-elect.
The Donald doesn't need to prostitutes, he insisted. "Firstly, Donald Trump is a grown up man," he began.
As someone who organises beauty pageants for many years, and "has communicated with the world's most beautiful women," Trump has no need for prostitutes, Putin says. The jury is out on whether any communication between women and Trump ever goes successfully, that is, in the woman's favour. Trump has been caught on camera saying if you're famous you can do whatever you want to women.
Credit: PA Images
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But then he says, "but they [the prostitutes] are the best in the world, obviously."
Um, what?
Is he saying that Russian prostitutes are the best sex workers in the world? And...what does that mean? They get the most money? The most customers? Do they have a high customer satisfaction rate? Are they just very conscientious sex workers? Perhaps more pressingly, does that mean that Putin has tried out other prostitutes and found them not as good as the ones in St Petersburg?
You can say what you like about Putin, but the man is patriotic.
Putin made some more claims. He said that the people who write "fake news", aka propoganda, are worse than prostitutes.
Well, there's some logic for you.
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Words: Laura Hamilton
Featured Image Credit: PA ImagesTopics: Donald Trump, vladimir putin