Thou shall never watch Eurovision.
Thou shalt stay up all night to get lucky.
Thou shall always take the sofa, should another LAD bring home a wench and need a bed.
Thou shall never claim a disadvantage due to console differences when playing FIFA.
Thou must challenge himself to attain breakfast the morning after a one-night stand.
Thou must accept that alcohol is the the world's greatest wingman.
Thou shall always remind a fellow lad of his conquests that he would rather forget.
If thou cannot lift her, then thou does not proceed to shift her.
If it tastes like chicken keep on licking, if it tastes like trout get the fcuk out
Thou shall never make substitutions after the 75th minute on FIFA.